Not My Circus
When I was a Christian, it felt like I had to be God's defense lawyer and PR person. For reasons unknown to me, a mere mortal, it was my responsibility to represent the all-knowing, all-powerful deity to whom I owed my worship. Why couldn't he just appear to the world and say, "Those people don't speak for me," I wasn't sure. We weren't supposed to test God. But all I knew was that I had to be a good witness, to always be ready to give a reason for the hope that I had, and in general to live in such a way that the gospel was shared and Jesus was glorified. This was a big responsibility, and it shaped the way I interacted with people who were not believers. I couldn't ever be fully and completely myself—I was representing God! I had to be on the lookout for opportunities to share about God, to talk about how peaceful and joyful I was, and to distinguish myself from others. Not by mere behavior or following rules, of course. We weren't legalistic l